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Someone who has a chronic or life-threatening illness, for example, might feel compelled to talk about it, even during a first meeting.But this goes against the first rules of dating: Keep it light, and let your date see your most attractive characteristics first.You need give and take, and being the life of the party isn't required. "I'm in good shape, and I look my best." If you've been out of the dating circuit for a very long time, it's possible that you've gotten a bit too relaxed about how you present yourself.
My audiences are people who are motivated enough to show up at such an event — but scared silly about diving into a dating world they hadn't even thought about for decades!
That's the individual who's still carrying the unpleasant events and feelings of their past relationships into the present.
Bitterness in any form — even if justified — will send most new people running as fast as they can in the opposite direction. "I don't want to divulge everything about myself right away." People who reveal everything on a first, second or third date risk overburdening the fledgling relationship with too much information.
Truly, the most winning way to get to know people is to get them to talk about themselves — and really listen closely.
Ask questions; help them be comfortable with you, and then reciprocate.
Dating isn't always fun — it can even be heartbreaking if you are entranced by someone and it isn't mutual. But if you have reasonable list expectations — for example, you want to meet a good person who is fun to be with and who shares your values and goals — you'll have an easier time.