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"My advice is this: wait as long as you can," Allen says.
Her rationale for these dating rules may seem obvious, but many people tend to forget in the heat of the moment.
If both people are playing by the same dating rules, sex can serve as the gateway to a consensual, committed relationship.
"I thought there were differences between men and women and how they felt about relationships.
"Every woman and man should know their boundaries before they start dating, and most of us don't," says Cheryl Mc Clary, Ph D, JD, professor of women's health at University of North Carolina-Asheville.
When Mc Clary refers to boundaries, she's not talking just about the physical boundaries that come with sexual territory. "Emotional wholeness is crucial to the decision process of whether or not to have sex," Mc Clary tells Web MD.
Having an honest conversation with yourself about sex is just as important as discussing it with your partner, experts say.But overall, I have found that very often they want the same thing," Allen says.Before I wrote this, I searched up on the topic and read every result in the first couple pages of Google. That’s like going fishing and not catching anything, then coming back and telling people there aren’t any fish. Ever had sex with someone, only to regret it and feel it was too soon?"Make sure your brain, heart, and penis are in conjunction -- they should all be in a straight line before you have sex," she says.Mc Clary believes all daters should invest the same amount of time conducting these 'self' conversations about personal dating rules as they do primping before a big date.
While a dating partner may not welcome this news, it at least can minimize later disappointments.