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The longer this goes on, the more you’re becoming convinced more than ever that this whole dating/sex/talking to other people thing is something that do and you’d be better off weighing the pros and cons of a monastic life of quiet desperation and a poetic death via alcoholism interspersed with self-pitying and slightly arch animated gif parades on Tumblr or women being bitches or any number of other things I told myself to explain my failures away.
An attitude of “This sucks, this will never work, I’ll never_______, only _____ people get to do _____,” only guarantees that you are indeed correct; it won’t ever work, nor will you ever do whatever it is that you’ve been hoping.
They’re self-limiting beliefs – beliefs that you allow to take over your life and restrict you from achieving what you hope to achieve. When you tell yourself that you will never ________ because only X guys do _______ and you’re not X, you’re artificially cutting yourself off from any and all possibilities.
Nowhere was this more apparent than in the early days of the Pick Up community, when people assumed that one of the secrets of success with meeting women is to “peacock”; that is, dress up in exotic or even outlandish ways in order to get attention.You will see every interaction in the worst possible light: “she doesn’t like me, she’s clearly repulsed by me, she’s only being polite, I’m misreading the signals” This apparently unending stream of reinforcement will only serves to perpetuate a vicious cycle; your self-limiting beliefs cause you to overlook evidence to the contrary, thus reinforcing the belief which, in turn, continues to make it impossible to see the truth. Believing in yourself – that you’re attractive, that you have a lot to offer others, that you can you.Your negative attitude will seep into Breaking negativity can be difficult; it takes time and effort to willfully decide to take a positive attitude and belief and stick to it. Just ask yourself: would you rather a world where everything confirms your worst fears or your fondest fantasies? and until I took the time to recognize this and actually address these issues, I was going to get better. I was sabotaging myself in a number of ways that I didn’t even realize…
I'm 41 years old, an aussie (complete with accent) living in Melbourne FL, well educated, open, honest, have a good sense of humor, laid back kind of guy who has been in 2 long term relationships back to back totaling 25 years and yes I am separated, but not divorced yet.